영문 Me Myself And Irene 미 마이셀프 앤 아이린 영화 대사
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- 2015.06.27 / 2015.06.27
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Me Myself And Irene Script
I got a star on my car and one on my chest
A gun on my hip and the right to arrest
Im the guy whos the boss on this highway
So watch out what youre doin when youre drivin my way
If you break the law youll hear from me l know
Im working for the state Im the highway patrol
Well, you know me when you see me cause my doors painted white
My siren a- screamin and my flashin red light
I work all day and l work all night
Just to keep the law and order tryin to do whats right
If l write you out a ticket
Then you better drive slow
Im just a-doin my job Im the highway patrol
Im the highway patrol The highway patrol
My hours are long and my pay is low
But lll do my best to keep you drivin slow
Im justa-doin my job Im the highway patrol
Meet Charlie- helpful dad, upstanding citizen...
and an -year veteran of the greatest law enforcement agency in the land.
- the Rhode lsland State Police.
Thats Charlies home- modest, like the man.
Even though he lived on the water,
Charlie wasnt much of a swimmer...
which will come into play a little later in our story.
But lm getting way ahead of myself.
You know, maybe its best if we just go back and begin at the beginning.
As a young man, Charlie had the world by its bootstraps.
He was the best young trooper on the force...
and was dating the prettiest and smartest gal in town.
Hername was Layla, just like the melody.
Mmm, Charlie.
You have no idea how much I love you.
- Yeah ? - Yeah.
- Well, will you stay with me no matter what ? - Of course, Charlie.
Well, what if l had to move to the Arctic, and you could never come home,
and you had to eat whale blubber for the rest of your life ?
- Would you still stay with me ? - Yeah, Id stay.
- But I hope that never happens. - Yeah, me too.
Well, by spring time,
they had made it official.
Boy, le tme tellyou,
that was some wedding.
It was presided over by Father Ken Gumbert,
and half the Rhode lsland State Police Force was in attendance.
- Congratulations, Charlie. - Thank you, Captain.
- Ooh ! - All right.
- Lookwhat I got. - Ooh !
Whoo. Here we go.
Ah.
Oh, um, excuse me. Do you people take checks ?
Say that again. Do we people take checks ? You mean, the black man ?
No, no, no, no, no. God, no. Your company.
Dont give me that backtracking bullshit. That was a racist slur !
No, it wasnt, really. I-l would never-
Tell you what ! Ill make it real easy for you.
Why dont you just pay me in cotton or a cartload of watermelons ?
Or hows about a couple of them buckets of fried chicken ?
Cause you know how we black people- we just love fried chicken, Mr. Charlie.
- Hey, no, come on now. Settle down. - Whats going on ?
This cat dont believe a nigger knows how to cash a check. Aint that about a bitch !
Charlie, I dont wanna ever hear you use the " N" word in this house.
What ? l- I never said anything remotely racist.
- Oh, so its the little people thing then ? - No !
You think just cause Im small, you can just push me around ?
Well, come on, my friend, lets boogie.
- Im gonna give you a little lesson in low center of gravity. - What ?
- Hey, whoa, hey, stop it !
Hey ! Cut it- Stop it now. Sir !
Dont patronize me with that "sir" crap.
- Whoa, hey, those are illegal.
Stop. Oh, God ! Ow !
- Oh, its on now ! Its on. - Charlie !
- Charlie, donthithim !
Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, stop it ! Charlie, stop it !
Charlie, Charlie. Hey, hey, hey, just let me handle this. Stop it !
Excuse me, Mister, um, "Jackson"-
Uh- Oh, stop it ! What-What-What is your first name ?
- Its Shonte.
Shonte, Im- I am- I am so, so sorry. I apologize.
Oh, come on, here. Let me walk you to your car.
I just dont have the patience for people who judge books by their cover.
And you shouldnt have to.
Treating me like a dumbshit. I mean, who does he think hes talking to ?
Im a tenured professor of molecular genetics over at Brown,
- and Im head of the Boston chapter of MENSA. - Youre kidding ?
No. Im just driving this limo as a sociologic experiment, thats it.
- But MENSA ? Im president of the Providence chapter. - Nokidding.
Just when Charlie thought life couldnt get any sweeter,
old Mr. Stork dropped in to pay him and Layla a visit.
- Its a boy !
Oh, boy, oy, oy.
Wow !
Hes so- Wow !
- Huh ? What ?
- Whoa, oh, my God, were in luck. Hes got company !
- Push ! Push !
Charlie loved those boys so much,
he just couldnt face the truth.
And so he went on with his life, as if everything was normal.
Hey, Finneran. Hey, Buddy.
- Hey ! Hope you brought your appetite with ya. - Oh, I did.
- Ahh ! - Charlie, your kids look great.
- Yeah, dont they ? Thanks. - Uh-huh.
- Charlie,
just between you and me,
did you ever notice that your kids have sort of a year-round tan ?
Yeah, well, uh-
- My great grandmothers halfltalian. - Halfltalian ?
Oh, yeah.
Well, thats probably why the water beads off their hair, huh ?
Yeah, so ?
- I mean, a lot of people have different kind of hair. - Oh, yeah.
I mean, what are you- what are you- what are you getting at ?
No, no, Im just saying is
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